"Oh, most of people are gone for summer. Do you sometimes feel lonely?" Three weeks ago a Japanese lady asked me when I was having lunch in a restaurant. That was the time right after most people left campus for home or internship. It did feel a bit lonely at the beginning, to be honest. Especially the transition of daily life from days full of meetings to tranquil days in this quiet campus in the suburb. It also felt like a whole town of people suddenly vanished in one or two days. And compare to last summer in Japan and Hong Kong, which was one of the best ever, this one in Princeton might not sound like the most interesting one.
“We do enjoy spending time with people, but at the same time, we also need a lot of space for ourselves.” One time, a friend who shares certain similar characters with me gave this precise description of us. Therefore, I guess the loneliness was not just about without many friends to hang out, but also the different living environment compare to Hong Kong, a small city. When I am at home, I can easily go to a book shop and a good restaurant in the centre of the city today, and I can easily go for an island day trip tomorrow, all by decent, clean and convenient public transportation. Whereas here is much harder to travel to a different environment if you don’t drive.
However, despite the anticipation of going home, I am also thankful for this solitude period in life. I am more and more convicted there are truly lessons one can only learn from solitude.
1) Take Him as the greatest joy and satisfaction
In spiritual high and worship session, one can easily feel compelled to commit to Jesus, and shout out in words or in silence that “our life is fully satisfied by you, God, you alone are my delight and satisfaction of my life.” While tough trials are certainly occasions to test our heart to such commitment, tranquil season can also post unexpected challenges to our heart after making this step, like complacency. A book called “Into the Heart and Mind of God” captures this dilemma very well, “Many situations, many trials and many difficulties will arise to challenge that step, and every one of those circumstances will ask the question: Did you really mean it when you began? How far did you really mean it when you said that you were going all the way with God?” Even without wrestling situations that motivate us to pray a lot, are we still keeping up our whole heart to seek Him, as we have committed?
In spiritual high and worship session, one can easily feel compelled to commit to Jesus, and shout out in words or in silence that “our life is fully satisfied by you, God, you alone are my delight and satisfaction of my life.” While tough trials are certainly occasions to test our heart to such commitment, tranquil season can also post unexpected challenges to our heart after making this step, like complacency. A book called “Into the Heart and Mind of God” captures this dilemma very well, “Many situations, many trials and many difficulties will arise to challenge that step, and every one of those circumstances will ask the question: Did you really mean it when you began? How far did you really mean it when you said that you were going all the way with God?” Even without wrestling situations that motivate us to pray a lot, are we still keeping up our whole heart to seek Him, as we have committed?
But at the same time, tranquil season is also a beautiful blessing. Without much preoccupation, there is eventually time and space to reflect on my past, and He has been so faithful to guide me to navigate the early years after I became Christian, which I did not recall any memory for a long time. There were ups and downs throughout the journey, but every season all points to His faithfulness in keeping me. And the quiet time every morning becomes the most refreshing time for each day. Basking in the morning fresh air, sitting on stairs under the shade of an arch, grooving in the gentle sunshine, while tasting His Word like the sweetest fruit, and relishing His teaching as the brightest light.
There's still a long way for me before I could get closer to that commitment, but I am thankful for I don't have to strive on my own. For ultimately he is our greatest keeper and teacher.
2) A thankful heart
I believe free time and relaxing heart somehow enable us to savor things we used to take for granted. One example is to be grateful to a friend who warned me multiple times via text and video chat to be loyal to this friendship while she’s away from campus and interning in another country. This may sound uncomfortably authoritative. But I know this is her implicit way to express how much she cherishes this friendship, also by the fact that she will be flying all the way to Hong Kong just for hanging out with me. Life is beautiful when we have things to feel excited about, and to give me energy to endure the French course, which is as interesting as the first class, which was not so interesting. Thanks Jesus, for in the midst of daily bombardment of vocabs and grammars like past participle, imperfect past, past definite, past indefinite and insane verb conjugation; there is hope for me to hang in. Three more weeks to go!! Ok, time to go back to study for the midterm tomorrow.
I believe free time and relaxing heart somehow enable us to savor things we used to take for granted. One example is to be grateful to a friend who warned me multiple times via text and video chat to be loyal to this friendship while she’s away from campus and interning in another country. This may sound uncomfortably authoritative. But I know this is her implicit way to express how much she cherishes this friendship, also by the fact that she will be flying all the way to Hong Kong just for hanging out with me. Life is beautiful when we have things to feel excited about, and to give me energy to endure the French course, which is as interesting as the first class, which was not so interesting. Thanks Jesus, for in the midst of daily bombardment of vocabs and grammars like past participle, imperfect past, past definite, past indefinite and insane verb conjugation; there is hope for me to hang in. Three more weeks to go!! Ok, time to go back to study for the midterm tomorrow.
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